Don't know how to cope right now after not getting closure

Me and my father had a very tough up bringing, the trauma he dealt with was unfortunately passed down in ways I won't get into. People who have been through it understand.

We became best friends when I became and adult and finally understood.

Today, after 10 years of paralysis from a stroke induced car accident I lost him. Due to personal hardships and addiction I lost contact the last several years with all family. I never got to tell him how much he really meant to me. I hope he knows. I'm glad to have a space like this to let this out, I don't have people in my life I am able to do this with.

That's all. Love you dad.