I'm stupid

I'm feeling so stupid. Mine is 17cm long and 15cm circunference girth in the girthiest part like in the middle. Since I was like 16 or 17 years old I had an horrible struggle with condoms so I never used them restricting sex to only girlfriends, cause I was worried about diseases. A lot of one night stands opportunities lost cause the condoms squeezed so bad and I lost the erection... Now I have 37 years old and I meet a woman who's deal breaker was the use of condoms, and I explained my problem and she stared at me and asked if I didn't knew that there are SIZES for the condoms... Imagine how was my face.... I felt and still feel so stupid... So I said to her that mine is not big enough, I'm 17cm long and she LAUGHED and explain me that the sizes aren't for the length but for the girth... I'm so stupid...