I'm alone, it's my fault. But I can't help it.

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Just for context, this is some kind of shadow work thing that I'm trying out. The reason I'm posting, is to actually see what people would think about the answers that I'm avoiding.

I want to connect with someone on a personal level, that type of friendship where you could always count on them to get you through tough times.

I heard somewhere that you should treat people how you want to get treated, but it doesn't seem to work for me. I get annoyed at seemingly the most shallow of stuff or get offended by some bullshit they say or do. And it really turns me off of people. Everything could be going well, and then they do one bad thing and I just completely lose interest in them as people.

I could treat someone as a friend on moment, then if they say something or do something I don't like then I f\*ck out of the friendship or even relationship.

It's just that, I have this intense yearning to be loved and love back. I just, don't want to get hurt by anyone.

But I guess those two things can't really get along.

I just want to not feel alone anymore. But I don't want to get hurt or be disappointed by people anymore.