vent

My view of kids has changed alot
I want children but its really difficult to imagine that ever happening, everytime i see a child i think about that groomers in my life wanted that, i feel the need to cry or throw up.
Its so inconvenient in everyday life
It disgusts me to know that people i loved just wanted that, to destroy something so precious i cant help but feel a sense of envy to because they get to live their life without any of that noise constantly going on
I just wish nothing had happened to me
i wish i could have kids without just picturing this again and again ajd again
I just want someone else to hear
I know that is bad of me but i cant really help it