Can anyone offer me a hug?

I'm probably the least deserving person of a hug and honestly, i have a lot of pent up frustration and depression within me. Today it's just another day when i realise that it's my own fault when it comes to everything. I don't have any friends and whenever i try to talk to someone on here, i end up being very defensive and mean to people for no reason. As much as i crave connection, i also fear it and there are some deep insecurities within me when it comes to my own self-worth and my place here on this planet. I hate seeing people irl together, which makes me angry. I also don't feel like i deserve what they have.

I could go on and on, but i feel like my excuses don't matter.