How do you know you’re done?

My heart wants one more, but my head says we’re done. I don’t know how to come to terms with that.

I always wanted one more. My second has been a much more challenging baby than my first. She’s very smart and hits all of her milestones early, she’s just not a content child. I breastfed for a year so postpartum was much harder for me. It felt like I was on a baby leash and it took my hormones forever to regulate. I’m 2 yrs postpartum and just starting to feel like I’m myself in my body again.

Im already 37 so the window is closing. My head says we’re good, but I just cry at the idea of being done. It is a chapter I’m not ready to close and didn’t anticipate closing. My oldest is also from a previous marriage and has another family. I know it sounds morbid but I think about if something happened to me, she’d go there and my youngest would be kind of on her own.

We had to do IVF and we have 5 more tested embryos. We can’t even do “see what happens” bc my husband has a 0% chance of conceiving without IVF (born without vas deferens). it’s literally all or nothing for us.

Just wondering if anyone has ever been in this place and which way you went/what helped you decide?