Sounds and sights of mother's death

My mother passed away this week from pneumonia, and I was with her until her final breaths. It was one of the hardest and scariest experiences of my life.

I had always imagined that being there at the end would be peaceful and that we'd somehow share a special final moment. Instead, after she seemed to stop breathing, she suddenly opened her eyes and took a loud gasp. Then there was silence, followed by another gasp. Each time it happened, I screamed and cried because I had no idea what was happening or whether she was suffering.

Since she died, I can't get the image of her face in those final moments out of my mind. Instead of remembering her smile, her expressions, and the life she lived, my mind keeps replaying those last few minutes. It's become so intrusive that I'm struggling to picture her as she was before.

Has anyone else experienced this after being with a loved one when they died? Did the flashbacks eventually fade? I desperately don't want those final moments to become my lasting memory of my mum. I'd really appreciate hearing from anyone who's been through something similar.