We’re not okay

I guess I’m just rethinking my life choices. It happens every so often. My LDR boyfriend is going through a presumably psychotic episode for the past 3 days, and is just hard to communicate with now. From what I remember, he was hospitalized for something similar a couple years ago, and was diagnosed with schizophrenia? Stopped taking medication at some point after because he didn’t like how it made him feel. I haven’t seen him like this since I’ve known him, starting around September this year. He’s been refusing to go to the hospital or see a doctor, just saying he’s tired, dehydrated, hungry etc all the while having conversations with himself/saying there is voices in his head/crying/laughing/barely able to keep a conversation going without his eyes searching elsewhere. I’m just so sad, I keep crying, mourning who he was and I’m so scared he‘ll never be the same. I don’t really have anyone to hang out with except him, he is my world in a way. I’ve just been going to work then spending time with him since we met. At least I had my siblings to spend time with before I moved.. I know it’s my fault that things are this way, I don’t get out and meet people. We met each other just a couple weeks ago, I was going to visit him at the end of the month. I miss him. I wish I could help him more.