Why I feel like I never understand whats going on, on a deeper level?

Title. Basically whenever am with NT people I feel like there's something that's not being talked or discussed but that it's obvious to them, that I dont know or am not aware, they have these precise and sharp focused looks in their eyes...when Im at work I feel too far behind everyone even thou they started working on the same date as me these guys act like as if theyve been there all their lives there and know everyone or like, the lore of everything, I don't know how to explain, meanwhile I just go there make my time and go home, I also feel like a fake in what am I doing, I always felt this way, I could never said "I was x amount of years in a certain place" because even if it was real I don't know how to prove it with the standards that would make them believe me I done that, meanwhile other people know how to summarize and prove what they did properly, in my case I feel like I could been doing something for years but not the proper way or the way some NT would do it, I never sound the same. Also another thing is like Im thinking or processing the situation in a some retarded way...like, meanwhile others are paying attention to important details in a situation being time savy, focused or being predatory for the sake of their own benefit, I am in a sensorial trip of emotions and feeling the lights and emotions and adrenaline of people around me that cant hear what they say...its like that quote that said "what you are shouts so loud I cant listen to what you say" I never make good questions or if I make them they act like, "ah, you asking that bs? Pffff are you retarded" kind of attitude