My (M27) girlfriend (F28) is stuck at university and ignoring my messages after asking about her plans. How do I approach this?

My girlfriend was supposed to graduate in 2024. She has done all her coursework, and her remaining requirement to graduate is a research project.

Years 2023-2025, there have been attempts from her to complete it, but she was not able to. Year 2025-2026, she decided not to return to uni, and she didn't continue doing her research work at all.

Since 2025, she has become evasive of the topic. Talking about it feels like walking on eggshells. So I just try to avoid talking about it all together. On rare moments that I tried bringing up the subject, her response was always "I don't know".

I understand that this has been causing her anxiety for a long time now. Her family has been kind of pressuring her about it. She avoids going out with our friends or other people to avoid questions about her status. So as much as possible, I try to avoid talking to her about it. However, this month is the registration period for the upcoming school year. If she didnt register now, she'll have to wait for another year to do so. Three days ago, I tried talking to her about her plans, and told her that she needs to move forward with her life. Either she continues or find a new path. Since then, she has not been returning my messages. (My messages are not that frequent. Just asking her about her day and stuff like that).

In retrospect, my message may have felt confrontational to her. But this has been eating her away, and it's kinda difficult to continue avoiding the elephant in the room. I know deep down, she wants to do something about it. I dont know if it's fear or shame or disinterest, but for some reason, she's physically unable to.

I personally dont care if she finishes her degree or not. I'll support her no matter what. But if she continues to avoid deciding and acting for her future, I worry it may affect her and our relationship.

How do I navigate this? How do I approach the problem with her?

TLDR. Girlfriend is stuck doing her research project for four years. She's evasive on conversations about it and now does not answer my messages after asking her of her plans.

Posted Aug 5, 2026, 1:28 PM UTC

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