Men want their woman to be attracted to them, but then i get called shallow for making appearance one of my top priorities
The reaction to the original post really made me think
i described my type (appearance wise) in this sub many times and said that i dont plan to settle for less, but each time men would reply to me telling me that appearance isnt everything and that theres more important things (money, personality, etc) as if i cant have both at the same time and i have to pick one or the other. i get called shallow / superficial / delusional for putting all of those things at the same level of importance (personality is as important as looks to me)
i'd never wanna end up feeling like im settling or being settled for, ideally i wanna be my man's type and i want him to be my type, appearance wise & personality wise,,,, but i keep getting told that that's unrealistic and that at some point i'll have to sacrifice one of those things and compromise on some of my standards (like what OOP did when she fell in love with a man who wasnt her type physically)
im confused, can the men here explain this to me ? which one is it, do you want women to care about appearance and wanna be with their type, or do you want them to do what OOP did and love her man purely for his personality even if his appearance isnt attractive to her ?
Posted Aug 5, 2026, 1:31 PM UTC