AIO over my bf saying a racial slur?

I sent my (M21) bf (M21) an ironic edit of Charlie Kirk and in one of the clips he said the ch slur (used for East Asian people). He then replied did he call someone a (slur) and I replied saying you can’t say that word and he brushed it off and didn’t apologise or anything. Keep in mind he’s fully white and I’m South Asian and we’ve been together for 1.5+ years.

He said that he typed it out because he was shocked that he said it in the video but he easily could have just.. not typed the slur out idk. It just seems weird to me. I said that it’s still offensive no matter the context in which it’s used in and that he wouldn’t say the n word and say oh but I didn’t mean it as a slur. He then said that he wouldn’t categorise the ‘n word’ and the ch slur together but him being white and trying to have a say in which slurs are ‘worse’, when he’s never experienced any sort of racism or prejudice doesn’t sit right with me. He hasn’t really apologised or anything and I’m not sure if I’m being too ‘woke’ when it’s ’just a word’. I’ve experience racism many times before and obviously him as a white man never will, so something about him not seeing the big deal about it just is weird to me. This hasn’t been our only discussion about race as well. I also previously was explaining how certain stuff is definitely rooted in racism but he was trying to disprove my arguments which again he’s never experienced anything like that so idk where he was coming from. Thanks!