"please don't hurt yourself"

Today, my cat passed away. She was only 2 months old but got sick and had FPV. We buried her in my garden. I cried a bit but tried to control is as much as I could until I was alone. My mother however continued to follow me in my bedroom. She knows that I cut myself, but she isn't aware of my relapses (most recent wa literally yesterday)

She wasn't leaving my room and I couldn't understand why. Then she said "talk to your friends, talk to me, cry, but please. Please don't hurt yourself"

I almost lost it then and there. Of course I was gonna cut myself, but now I don't know what to do. The guilt of making my mother feel like this is horrible. In the end I made her leave but I'm at a loss. I can never cry much to release my emotions, and I don't want to talk to anyone. It never helps.