Why it's Always me being ended up Alone??...

It gonna be a big rant. So, I Finished My Inter after the big chuck of 2.5 years and finally passed my exams. Of course since I was only grinding for my exams for 2 years, I couldn't make any social life and whatever was there I literally subtoaged it. So, Once I Passed Inter, I Really Thought that I should start being more social.

I got selected in One of the good Mid size firms in bangalore by gods grace. What followed after is the nightmare. I selected for a team with just 5 members (even thought my office has other bigger groups). From the beginning everything was Nice, but later all these five people particularly started ignoring me specially for breaks or any little social thing. Like they won't even ask me whether you had lunch or not in whole day. But Whenever it comes to work, I always put in place and criticized and pointed that I'm wrong.

Believe Me. I can talk very well. It's not like I'm an introvert. I can talk more than 4 languages 🥲🥲. Yet I'm the one who's left out in that room out of all. It feels bad to sit alone during lunch and breaks everyday, while everyone in the entire cabin somehow manages to include their teammates, yet my teammates are the only one who's turned to be Asshole.

I have made consistent effort to mingle with this group since starting, believe Me. After 5 months, it gave zero outcome. Before saying go and talk to other groups, it's too late 🥲🥲 because Already other groups have got setup and now If I go and talk it will look desperate.

Everyday I come out from office with headache. Like even zero person in that office to show empathy, everyday drains me out. Recently opted threapy just for this thing.

So, I Always think is it me who always bound to be alone. I Even blame my looks for it. Like I'm very mature for my age, is it why people ignore me everywhere and end up being Alone in all places despite of all my efforts.

People who ask to change the work place, it's really nice firm. Their salary package is Nice. It's very hard to get that exposure and salary outside. But everyday my office drains me out. What Makes me feel is, there is not even single person in that office who could see that someone sits alone and have empathy for me.

And I have done all efforts. Yet this is the result. So, Am I Always bound to be alone. I wonder Whyy. Why it always happens to me.