Want do I do now I’ve discovered I would prefer to be alone?

I’m married (M36), have a kid with my wife (w38)
I recently have been struggling with life at home.
Nothing seems right, same old slog every day.
Work, home,food, tv bed.
Not feeling any real connection to wife or kid.
Don’t get me wrong, I love them dearly, unfortunately I mostly love being alone.

I run a small business, long hours, weekends, bank holidays nights. You name it, I work it.
I get home, there’s shopping to do, wife doesn’t like it, food to cook, wife doesn’t like it unless I refuse point blank to do it for once.
Trash needs taking out, repairs cleaning I’m on it

When I’ve been working it all gets behind cause my wife just can’t organise herself to do it.

As I’m writting I’m realising how macho this looks.

When it all hit
I went on a business trip recently for a few days.
Bored one night I went out, great fun. I meet people and enjoy some time brain switched off.

I have a penchant for stripclubs.
My way of thinking is watching is not cheating no sex no guilt no problem.

The problem is this: I thought I went there to just watch a naked stranger but in fact the girl in front of me was kind, friendly just curious about me.

It’s her job to get me talking, make me comfortable, end game is squeezing cash out of me I know that

But we talked a lot and knowing we wouldn’t see each other again I shared a lot of things I realised I’ve been carrying for a while.
Since a long time I felt listened to, important in some way. Not just a wallet and handyman.

I feel like an absolute miserable dick right now, it seems very selfish but that’s what is up.

It is what it is, motto I have engraved in the side of my skull, words I live by: this is it, deal with it.

So long now this trip has hit me with a reality I didn’t really want to feel:
What if I really don’t want this and I am unhappy?
What then?