Was this past event an AIO on my part?

Trigger Warning: SA.

So about 13 years ago, I (22f) was at University and had a bf. I met a guy that I lived on campus with, he lived in the apartment above me, and back then I honestly felt like it was one of those moments when you lock eyes with someone you're going to remember forever. I didn't talk to the guy for about a month before we ran into each other again on the way back to our dorms, we both had bf/gf's and knew that we were talking to each other in flirty ways. It was dumb of me and I admitted to my bf that there was a guy who I considered a friend who I was flirting with. Turns out the guy also told his girlfriend but she took it one step further and messaged my bf and told him we had hooked up. It completely took me by surprise because the guy friend and I had flirted and hung out in his apartment (in his room) and we gave each other "consensual back rubs" is what he told his gf, it was exactly just that, but she took it as more. It became such a big thing that when I tried to talk to the guy about it he brushed me off and actually called me a vulgar name. My bf and I had ended things because this guy's gf kept messaging my bf AND his mom about what I had done. I understood/and i understand now that what I did was a form of cheating, but here's where it gets messy.
Weeks after, the guy's dorm mate dms me and is asking me what happened to get a read on why the guy is not talking to anyone in the apartment. I give him the tldr, and he says what happened sucked for me. He invited me up to say my peace/explain it all to the other dorm mates because everyone is confused and not on talking terms with the guy.
So I come up and explain it all, I tell them I'm sorry, then they told me they didn't know he had a girlfriend because he had been bringing up me and another girl to his room every other night.
I shouldn't have been surprised there, but that's when the dorm mate that reached out to me asks for a back rub, saying he heard from the guy when we first started talking that I gave good back rubs.
(Again I should've seen the signs, I was young and naive).
The dorm mate tells me to give him one in his bed because his other dorm mates are in the living room drinking. I say "okay," like a dummy, and during the back rub he starts inappropriately touching me. Note: because this is a dorm room format, the bed is off the ground about 4-5ft. So I try to get myself out of the situation but as I do he pushed me back on his bed and starts the SA. It took me a good 10 minutes of me fighting back and telling him to get off me for him to finally do so.
I run out of his apartment and down to my RA and explain the situation. She takes me to get checked out immediately after, and in the nurses office they ask if I want to file a report. They explain this whole thing that it can get really messy if I involve the police, so I can either report it to the campus authorities or the police department. I choose the campus authorities thinking it would be easier and better for everyone.
A week goes by before the guy and his dorm mate get the letter about how they're going to be called in by campus authorities and go through a hearing including me about what happened.
I knew they must've got the letter because as soon as I got it myself, the guy and all of his dorm mates are shouting out the window every time I walk by calling me names and shouting that I'm a homewrecker. They're purposely leaving their windows open to yell at me and my friends. One of the dorm mates cornered my friend (who lived on the higher level of the same building) and said she would be next.
Both my friend and I decided to put in restraining orders against them, we do it just days before the hearing and the hearing goes... kinda bad?
The Dean of the Uni is there along with a jury of my peers and instructors. The person I chose as my advocate is there along with my RA, we all give our statements separately. The dorm mate that SA'd me came with his mom, and the guy gave his statement with his own advocate as well.
They reach a decision a few days later saying that he who SA'd me will not be expelled but suspended for 5 days from campus and classes and will be able to go back to his apartment after. He was going into the medical field and they did mention he would take a different route to class to avoid me and to abide by the restraining order.
The problem was that he found a way around the restraining order and him and his roommates would be on the first floor where I lived and would show up in the common area and it would kind of force me to slink back into my room away from my friends. And his roommates that took the same route to classes would give me looks all the way there and they'd still shout from their apartment windows.
I felt bullied out of my own life. When I brought it up to my friends they said to just ignore them and they'd stop, but when I wasn't around my friends they were having a good time laughing and one time I saw my friends having a good time with the guy that SA'd me.
It finally clicked in me that maybe I was the wrong person to be there. So I left in the middle of the school year and moved back in with my parents.
One of my friends (and an ex) not from the University (but hung out with all of my friends there) told me I deserved what had happened to me.
It only made me feel worse about myself and that maybe I was the one that overreacted on everything?
I still think about this from time to time.
I had a therapist who I worked through the SA with, but they always told me having an overwhelming feeling doesn't mean it's an overreaction. But it never really answered my question.

Could I have been the one overreacting?
Should I have done things differently?

Note: I'm about to be 35 now, I have a kid and a wonderful husband. But I don't have many friends and I always think I don't have friends because this whole situation 12 years ago set a standard in my head/heart for how friends should have my back and treat me better.