idk.

why doesnt it get better dude. im so tired of having to pretend im okay. im so tired but i cant even tell anyone. I wanna tell my best friend but i dont wanna worry her and make her waste her gas coming down to me. i am sofucking tired i just want to kill myself. nothing makes me happy. i feel so empty.

Im genuinely worth nothing. I do nothing, I am nothing. I don't want to do this anymore, Why should i exist just to be pathetic and waste space? not to mention how i know somethings wrong with me but i cant even get a diagnosis because of how fucking long the wait is and everything.

im so tired. why cant i just end it all. i dont want to do it anymore.

Anyway. relapsing cause of this shit after almost a year clean. i'm 19 dude, this is so fucking pathetic of me.