Feeling weird on antidepressants working

I think I am uncomfortable with my medications working.

I feel like my brain wants to be sad and wants me to be depressed, but those feelings are muted.

I basically feel like I'm not feeling what I'm supposed to feel, like I am blue balling depression.

I have been on Wellbhtirn for over 13 weeks now, and just increased my Lacmital dose from 100 to 150.

My depression feels sort of "muted", like it's supposed to be there but I don't hear it.

This is uncanny. I don't know if I'm just self destructive or what.

This makes me want to just stop taking medication and give up ;-;

Has anybody else felt this way?