Trapped in loop

I'm not sure if this in the correct subreddit, but anyways I've had this specific problem essentially forever and I'm not sure if it's normal or something else?

I noticed I have this tendency to have set 'Behavior' or personalities that vary on two specific things: Person and place. And these behaviors are based on first interactions.

here's an example:

Say I was sad or angry or felt weak one day when I first met this person, now lets say it's a week later, I feel this extremely strong unavoidable feeling to continue acting like that so to not alter their perception or EXPECTIONS of me. And I do this in every setting, my mind will pick a one or multiple 'Refrence persons' based on many varibles on how to act, even if I don't try to do it and traps me in this set of ways.

I feel a need to have some kind of person to 'ground' my personalities or limit so I don't alter their perception of me. I guess this stems from a fear on how others see me, but at the same time during some settings I'll feel untouchable or very egotisical even though I can still sense I do.

I feel like I don't have a static personality and that I'm just acting.