[ Removed by moderator ]

It was music period, and that year we had a notoriously bad teacher, well, we usually had her no matter the grade. Let's call her Mrs. Godfrey (not tryna use her real name). So Mrs. Godfrey was on her usual bs of not teaching us and expecting us to play an instrument perfectly with no prior teaching or practice, and then, me and 2 other friends went out into the hall because the class was pretty loud, cuz of the instruments and the fact that nobody cared about the class, other than band kids ig. We were practising Guitar I believe, and that day I was having a pretty bad day already, not to mention the fact that I've always hated music period, because of Mrs. Godfrey, and the fact that I was genuinely shit at all instruments, especially the Guitar though, because my fingers would be in pain while doing it. Moving on, my two friends went inside to tune their Guitars, because Mrs. Godfrey didn't EVER do it after a class ended. My friends and I were having a decent time in the hall, but when they left, my mind went back to all the negative thoughts of the day, and then this little kid came up to me. He was like Indian, maybe South Indian to be more specific, 1st or 2nd grade, and he had one of those glasses that had a lanyard around the back so they don't fall off. He walked up to me cockily, well, that's what I was thinking, and I guess he was just being a kid and wanted to see what the big kids were learning in music. This pissed me off for some reason, and as he looked at my sheet, I yelled, "PISS OFF!", and he ran away, then my friends came back, and before I processed it, we started fucking around and making jokes again. I only realized after I came back home and finished my homework, and had some time to chill and process the day, this was a Friday, btw. And then, that evening, or the day after, because it was the end of the year-ish (June), pretty hot day, so me and my family decided to go to the community swimming pool, and I was thinking: "Ima chill, swim a bit, got no hw for the weekend, come home n shower, it's gonna be good", but after I came back from the FILTHY change rooms, I just wanted to go in the water, and I wanted to go ALLLLL the way over to the more secluded, deep end of the pool so I could get a good swim, I was already pissed off having to walk all the way there, cuz this was also after practice, (my family being at the shallow end, btw, not sure if they were out yet) but as I walked over to that side, two siblings, mixed, 6 or 7 years old, starting splashing each other in the shallow end, as kids do, but the water was cold AS FUCK, and, already being pissed, I yelled "FUCK!!!" and I kid you not, BOTH siblings had the EXACT same reaction as the Indian kid from music class, and ran away. So the guilt doubled, or tripled, should I say, considering there were 3 kids, and that ruined my mood to swim too, cuz I just realized I did the exact same thing, and swore at some little kids. I was usually never like that, I was never good in social situations with strangers or kids to begin with, but I always tried to be kind, Idk what got in me, and I feel bad and guilty to this day, there's a small chance I can meet the kid at my old school if I go there for my high-school volunteer hours and apologize, but it's small, and I can never apologize to those kids at the pool again. I first wrote all this down so there was this small chance maybe the parents or older siblings see it, and if the kids told them, and they'd remember, they'd figure out I was sorry, but that is a BIG what-if. What do you guys think?