I feel hideous, and I am scared to look in the mirror.

Hi, I’m a 5’9 19 years old guy, and I am really struggling on sticking around. I don’t wanna go too far into detail about it, but I’m pretty fucking ugly, maybe not the ugliest guy in the world, but nothing above a 4, probably a 2 from the side, I have a short, protruding nose, oily bumpy skin, recessed infras, lopsided face, I’m overweight, etc. The only thing I really got going for me is my nice, brown, long ish hair which I use to cover my face. I’m trying to fix the fixable stuff - I’m getting whitening strips for my teeth, trying to find a skin care routine, losing weight, I plan on starting the gym soon, and I’m seeing a physical therapist soon to try and fix my bad posture and muscle imbalances, which should (hopefully) make me look much better. But there’s a problem, I’m not sure how to explain it, but I have bad genetics, and I’m terrified I will put all this effort in, and still be ugly. It’s consuming every second of my life, I’m constantly checking mirrors, and taking pictures, which always make me feel worse because I look terrible, and telling myself nobody will ever love me, which is probably true, I can’t have fun with my friends, I’m struggling to eat, I don’t even want to leave my house. What can I do to take my mind off this while I attempt to better myself? I’m on lexapro, but it doesn’t feel like it’s working, I’m not sure how much longer I can take this stress, it’s all I think about. Also, to be clear, I’m not an incel, I have absolutely nothing against woman