I (33F) have been dating my boyfriend (27M) for three years and I’m starting to feel kind of stuck.

My boyfriend asked my dad over a year ago for his blessing to propose to me. This got me super excited. However, every time I thought he was going to do it- he didn’t. This has happened multiple times where I thought he was going to propose and felt stupid for thinking so. When I ask him he says it’s about finances but I don’t really understand why it should take over a year. I want to start a family and my time is running out. A few months ago, we got into a huge argument because he was upset I was exploring my passions instead of doing chores all day. (I have ADHD so chores are already a challenge.)

I recently decided to make a full career transition. I went to college and had an awful time in the field. I’ve been let go multiple times and really didn’t enjoy it. I was burned out and fed up so I got out. Since then, I’ve been experiencing kind of a spiritual awakening if you will. I feel inspired and creative and more ME. Like the imposter syndrome has lifted. I’ve been doing a lot of self-discovery and exploring what my actual passions and interests are. It’s been amazing- but my boyfriend doesn’t feel like that. He says I’m wasting my time.

I fell into a rabbit hole a couple months ago about a topic I’m really interested in. They say your energy attracts others vibrating on the same energy as you. Well, I happened to have somebody on here reach out to me a few weeks ago on a subreddit about that topic. I’ve kinda developed a crush on him…There’s a lot of weird uncanny coincidences I can’t really just ignore. The main thing is he makes me feel VERY seen and heard. (My boyfriend doesn’t share some of the interests I have and often isn’t very deep or emotional.) This guy shares ALL of my interests and then some. And he’s super attractive and thoughtful and seems to really understand me. Our conversations are naturally moving from more surface level to intimate. I think this guy might be helping me realize some things I’m currently lacking in my relationship.

I’m not in a “Oh wow I’m definitely breaking up with my boyfriend so I can runaway and be with this guy” mindset. And I don’t think I necessarily want to break up with my boyfriend either. I’m just confused.

Has anyone experienced this before? I need some advice and direction. It’s a weird position to be in for sure.

**TL;DR;** : I (33F) am experiencing a transitional self awakening and am feeling confused about my current relationship (27M).