I 21F feel like I've been sexually taken advantage of by my boyfriend 26M of 7 months, and I don't know what to think

I (21F) have been with my boyfriend (26M) for about 7 months. Until recently, I genuinely felt like he treated me amazingly, hes always talked good about from everyone around us, and that I've gotten lucky to be with him, I genuinely felt that way.. and these kinds of situations haven’t really happened during our relationship. That’s part of why I’m so confused and hurt right now.

A few days ago, something happened that I’ve been thinking about ever since.
It was my 21st birthday, and I was tipsy (for the first time ever, yes I waiting until my 21st for some alcohol) but definitely not drunk. We went back to our hotel, got comfortable, and were laying in bed. I felt that he was aroused and I initiated things by touching him. He started touching me too, and at first I was enjoying it.
At some point, though, I started feeling uncomfortable and wasn’t really sure what I wanted anymore. I didn’t clearly say “stop,” and that’s something I’ve been struggling with because I keep thinking maybe I’m overreacting since I had initially initiated things.
Eventually we had sex, and afterward I just felt weird about the whole thing. Like I said, I was a little tipsy so I don't even know. I’ve been thinking about it ever since and feeling like maybe I was taken advantage of, but I was scared to bring it up because I don’t know how he’d react or whether he’d think I was accusing him of something horrible.

Then tonight something happened that made those feelings come rushing back.
He started touching me and I initially enjoyed it, so I let him continue. It went on for around 15 minutes. Halfway through though, it stopped feeling good and It became uncomfortable. I didn’t say anything at first. Then he aggressively opened my legs to get better access to me.
At one point I positioned myself so that I was facing him because I thought maybe he would have sex with me, and I thought I might actually enjoy that. Instead, he picked me up and put us into a 69 position because he wanted me to perform oral sex.
I kept pulling away and laughing because I didn’t really know how to handle what was happening, but he kept forcing me back down into the position. I think I quietly said something along the lines of "I don't like this" while laughing, but I don’t think he heard me.
Eventually I just gave in and did it.
The weirdest part is that I feel like I wasn’t even really there mentally. I was zoned out. I wanted to cry. He was still being affectionate toward me, rubbing my body and kissing me..although I wasn't even facing him, but I just felt completely disconnected from what was happening.
After he finished, I cleaned myself up and went into the bathroom. I stayed in there for a bit and cried for a little bit. Then I had to lock in and go back out and act normal.
Now I feel numb.. used. I feel like he can tell something is wrong, but I’m trying to act happy because I don’t want him to know how upset I am.

I don't know what to do from here. I love him, and this hasn't been how our relationship normally is, which makes this even harder to process. I genuinely feel like he would feel horrible if he knew how badly this affected me, and I don't think he intentionally wanted to hurt me.

For people reading this from the outside, how would you interpret what happened? I keep questioning whether I’m putting too much meaning into it because I initially participated and eventually gave in, or whether my reaction makes sense given what actually happened. I would really appreciate honest perspectives from people who aren’t emotionally involved in the situation.