Since widows often do better than widowers would it be better for men to marry when older ?

I am a 19 year old guy so I don’t know much, sorry if I sound insensitive, I am autistic, I was just wondering if according to that I should marry young or older. A 40 year old guy marrying a 20 year old woman would ensure he technically has a 90% chance to die before her, if a woman dies before her husband he would most likely feel more sadness than the opposite if he lost her, not to shame women but that’s biological, men love deep as a coping mechanism since men in nature are disposable (1 men can impregnant 100 women) while women are inherently valuable since they carry life, with that logic a man that “obtains” a woman is incredibly happier than the opposite since he gets to have a a chance to pass his genes compared to his wife that could have been in a polygamous relationship with another guy in nature; she also had to biologically be able to adapt to her husband dying in hunting which was quite common.

This fact makes widows generally feel happier than widowers, we often hear stories of widowers ending their own life or being depressed, but for widows life often just goes on normally since they have more emotional intelligence, less reliance on sex and often a better social network, therefore what would be optimal would be for guys to die first.