Split custody - how do I keep my kids clothes marked?

Hello everyone, hoping to get some sound advice from other parents that may have or currently are navigating a similar situation.

I am about to finalize my divorce. I’m coming out of an extremely abusive and controlling relationship with the father of my children whom I was with for almost 14 years. We were awarded 50-50 custody and currently have a week on and week off schedule. I let this man keep everything. My freedom and safety are my most prized possessions out of all of this. He is such a petty man that paid tens of thousands of dollars to a lawyer, but left me with nothing.

My aunt and uncle stepped in to help me with my children’s needs for going back to school, as I incurred about $30,000 in debt and I’m so broke I even overdrafted and have about $22 to my name at the moment. They spent about $700 on clothing alone, not including shoes or school supplies and I want to ensure that I take care of these items as best as I can.

I’d like to know if there are any tips or tricks for marking the clothing in a way that helps me and maybe my children keep track of the clothes that belong in my home when they are with their dad and getting ready to return to me. I ordered some fabric markers, but those were terrible. I thought about a black sharpie and marking the tags, but wondering if maybe there are other cool gadgets or innovative ideas that other parents have used? I would appreciate all the cool and preferably affordable options to help me take care of this clothing.

This man has had the nerve to ask me to return specific shoes, hats, even toys that I have purchased for my children because he does not want to spend the money- even though he has hundreds of thousands of dollars that he kept from me- to make sure his children are clothed properly. I think it’s completely unfair that little by little one piece of clothing at a time he keeps stuff that he did not purchase.

If you read all of this, thank you. I’m an exhausted mom but very much looking forward to rebuilding my life.