My (20M) boyfriend has been breaking up with me (18F) almost weekly for around 3 months now, I don’t know if i’m the problem or he just doesn’t want to be in this relationship anymore, can someone help me figure it out?

Me (18F) and my boy friend (20M) have been dating officially for 9 months now. We have been going through a rough patch for almost 3 months now, practically it’s weekly we get into an argument and he tells me he’s tired of me and tired of the relationship and wants out. Of course I don’t want things to end between so I beg him to stay and he does. When we eventually talk about it when things have calmed down he tells me “of course I didn’t want you to actually leave” or “I never want this to be over with I love you.” But I feel like if he really didn’t want things to be over with he wouldn’t continuously try and end things? I’ve expressed this to him and he promises not to do it again but not even a week later he does it.

For context he’s started to get distant, ignores me for hours, goes out without telling me, stopped telling me about his life asking me about mine, complimenting me, or putting ANY effort into this relationship. I’ve asked him to put effort into the relationship and to reassure me, especially when i’m overthinking and he always promises he will and then tries to break up with me the day or hours after.
It’s become a weekly thing of him breaking up with me and me begging for him back.

I finally had enough and let him break up with me “for good” 2 days ago. I decided I wouldn’t keep begging for him after he told me over and over he was done. He then texted me a couple hours later backtracking saying he doesn’t want to be done but if i am he won’t be mad at me for leaving. Of course I said I didn’t want to leave and we got back together.

I guess he thought I would just be fine and not bring it up again because I usually just suck it up after getting him back, but tonight it was just eating at my mind i needed reassurance, so i texted him saying I was really sad about what happened. We had a quick conversation and I guess I said something I shouldn’t. I said “Don’t take this the wrong way but i don’t really understand why you’re with me” and he broke up with me again.

All I wanted was reassurance because I haven’t been able to stop crying, now he’s telling i’m manipulating him and he can’t do this anymore because I make him feel like he has to change his character. But the thing is everything im asking of him is just normal boyfriend stuff, not only that but he used to do that without me having to beg so i dont understand. Is he just tapped out of the relationship and keeping me here just because? Or am I really being manipulative and causing these fights between us. I don’t want to breakup with him but if this is what he actually wants I love him enough that i’ll let him go. it’s just confusing because he won’t be straightforward with me it’s always a different answer.