Disordered eating...saved my life?

I have a complicated relationship with food and ed. I didn't eat as a kid. My parents had to have teachers spy on me at lunch to make sure I was eating. I was in a very high percentile for low weight because I didn't eat. And on top of all of this, I played high intensity sports, so any food I did eat was used up. Male puberty can only do so much with no nourishment+a malnourished childhood. Should I be grateful? I feel guilty almost because I know ed haunts a lot of people, including close friends. And I can't talk about mine without feeling like I'm glorifying it