Featured: Coffee with chia latte creamer and a Luna bar

(Trigger warning: uncomfortable sexual conduct mentioned)

So buckle up while I navigate you through several years of red flags.

My husband (40) acts like it is his first day on planet Earth, and I'm sick of it. It is always something with this guy. 

First, it was an alcohol addiction. This lasted several years and caused so many fights. He treated me like a huge asshole while he was drunk, and would openly watch porn on his phone while I was trying to sleep. It was a lot. Eventually, he quit and I also quit out of solidarity. I thought things would be better after that.

Next, he had a psychotic break. 2 actually because he had a 2nd when he stopped taking his meds. He accused me of wild and impossible things, called me all sorts of names, and would not let me sleep. Like an idiot, I stuck by because he "needed my help." I was finally able to get him to a psychiatrist and ensure he took his meds every day. I thought, surely things would get better at this point.

Now, he is clueless about how life works. He stays at home all day and watches tv/plays games. I asked for help. We have a kid, I work full time, and I was finishing up a degree (graduated this year!). The help I asked for was basic. Clean the dishes, do some laundry, vacuum, help with bath time. Anything. I asked maybe 3 times before I broked down crying and begging. Now he sort of does laundry and dishes. 

He's also stopped wanting to be intimate with me. He is totally fine asking for hand jobs, but looks so disappointed when I suggest normal sex. When we do have sex, it is so unenthusiastic. I have brought this up multiple times too, and am only listened to when I start crying. His solution is to give me hugs and chaste kisses occasionally. Guys, I'm done. I should have been done ages ago.

I told him we were separating, and it was 99.9% certain to lead to divorce. He asked for a hand job the next day. 

Girls. If you haven't noticed, I'm a huge idiot for putting up with all of this for so long. I'm ready to cut the cord. I just need some encouragement to get through the hard part. 

I need girl advice to help me stay strong