I Am Unable to Give Myself Grace

I’ve been depressed from a young age. A lot of it was brought on from my circumstances, but a lot of it is also due to my overwhelming anxiety and perfectionism. Instead of developing a positive relationship with the perfectionism, now I am simply unable to do anything.

I hate how I look. I hate how others see me. I hate how I see myself. I’m so mean to me and yet I’d never be mean like this to another person. Nothing is ever enough and all I can see in my future is failure. The thing I hate the most is the fact that I can’t even take a compliment at face value. I’ve been bullied and made to feel worthless for so long that compliments simply have to be lies in my mind.

I hope I die soon.