3 months girl still married can't tell if I walked away too soon

TLDR: Was taking it slow with a girl for 3 months, did everything but with a label (long-distance most of it). Found out 3 weeks in she's still married, divorce "in progress." Flew out for 2 weeks for her birthday and had good moments, but she also repeated jealousy accusations, being called stubborn/short-tempered, and her tying a lot of it to trauma from her ex cheating on her. Left feeling distant instead of closer, tried to end it, she pushed back and wanted to keep going. We finally broke it off yesterday and I've had a pit in my stomach since week 3. Was I right to walk away, or was I not giving this enough of a chance?

Some background: the past few years of dating have been pretty dry for me. I'm also in a bit of a depressive stretch right now, so a lot of my emotions have felt kind of muted in general.

I (25M) met a Latina girl (26F) on Tinder right after getting back home from a vacation. We connected instantly, and it turned into 5 days straight being together, 3 of them in a hotel because her ex had just kicked her out of their place. After the 5 days I left to travel abroad for a month, and she moved across the country to be near family.

While I was abroad I wasn't really on my phone much, but we still texted every day. She told me she missed me and didn't like the feeling of waiting around for texts from me. Around the third week of traveling she almost ended things because I wasn't giving the attention she craved. We talked it through, and I got more conscious about letting her know how my day was going, what my plans were, etc. The thing that shocked me when we spoke was that she told me she was married, though she said the divorce was already in progress and nothing was going on between her and her husband. I didn't really know how to feel about that, especially since she was telling me 3 weeks in, and said she understood if I didn't want to continue talking. She's from another country and explained the marriage situation, which I won't go into but I didn't end it there.

Once I got back home, she felt I was taking things a bit fast and broke it off a week after I got back, telling me she couldn't give me what I wanted. We ended up talking again the very next day, and about a week later I locked in plans to fly out and spend 2 weeks with her for her birthday and to travel with her.

Those 2 weeks had a lot of good in them hiking, camping, exploring the area, eating out, movies. But there were recurring issues too. She accused me of checking out other girls multiple times: first on the boardwalk, then at a restaurant when two girls who were minors with bright blue hair walked by, then again while we were out at a salsa club (I'm not much of a dancer, so I was just watching how people moved). I told her that I only had eyes for her.

Despite everything I'd done to be there for her traveling across the country, driving her to work at 4am, picking her up, doing everything together she told me I didn't care about her or like her at all during the trip. She also said I was stubborn and short-tempered and I get annoyed easily. I asked her what she meant, since I hadn't shown any of that or raised my voice at all.

The next morning from the club we talked about what she'd said, which really hurt me. She pointed it toward past trauma from her ex and the bluntness she said comes with being Latina. I could understand it, but almost 3 months in, with her projecting this and some other things onto me, it started to wear on me. Even if it's true why would someone say that a person doesn't care or like them after traveling across the WHOLE country? How much reassurance does someone need if actions are louder than words?

Physically, things were good, but she wasn't very vocal or expressive during sex, which made it seem like she wasn't enjoying it even though I always made her finish multiple times. She told me it was great for her and that I "had a perfect dick," so it wasn't that anything was wrong, just a disconnect I couldn't quite read.

When I left at the end of the 2 weeks, she cried a lot, told me how much she was going to miss me. I told her I'd miss her too, but wasn't nearly as emotional about it. The next day, I was about 45 minutes away from her and she said she wanted to see me one more time before I left to visit family in another state. When I got that message, I felt no excitement about it, I just wanted space to think. I stayed a bit distant, and she noticed, calling it out but also owning that she'd been projecting her trauma onto me, and truly apologized.

When I left the state, we spoke on the phone 3 days later and I tried to end it. She understood my reasoning but told me I took her words too seriously and that I was giving up too soon. She then suggested we go to her home country for two weeks to reconnect to allow her to show me around, not a formal meeting-the-parents type trip, since we'd just get an Airbnb. I agreed, and things felt better for a few days, but the more I sat with it, the less certain I felt about going on the trip. She kept telling me she didn't want to lose me though.

Yesterday we finally ended it. She was crying on the phone, told me we could improve and grow together, but I just don't know if this is worth fighting for. I've had a pit in my stomach pretty much since the third week, and I'm still conflicted on my feelings.

Was this actually red-flag territory this early, or am I holding it to too high a standard since nobody is perfect and I have issues as well.....