My sex drive have been unusually strong lately. How do I deal with it?
problem/goal:
Lately, I've been experiencing a really high fluctuation in my sex drive and sexual feelings. It's gotten to the point where I feel like I'm craving actual sexual intimacy, not just masturbation. I can still control myself naman, but it's becoming harder lately, especially because there's someone who's basically fueling the fire.
I'm trying to figure out how to deal with these feelings because I genuinely don’t know how.
context:
I'm 21M and currently single. I'm usually a “Mr. Priorities” type of person. I don't really focus much on relationships or sexual stuff because I have goals that are more important to me right now. If there's something important I need to accomplish, I usually just put these things aside and focus on my priorities.
In fact, this isn't really how I've been in the past. There were even two people before who invited me to be FUBU, but I turned them down because I genuinely wasn't interested in those things. I was more focused on my own priorities and didn't really bother with casual sex or relationships.
But lately, my sex drive suddenly became so fucking high. I don't even masturbate much anymore because it doesn't really satisfy the feeling. Parang my body is craving actual sexual intimacy instead.
I also have a female friend, who's been one of the closest people to me. She's someone I genuinely care about and feel very comfortable with. She's also someone I can talk to about personal things.
The problem is, she has a boyfriend.
I've also developed feelings for her, both romantically and physically. I was actually trying to move forward because I know she's taken, and for a while I felt like I was finally getting over it.
But recently, we've been having more conversations about sexual topics. She's told me about some of her fantasies and interests, including things she apparently doesn't normally tell other people. She also told me privately that if she didn't have a boyfriend, she might be hooking up right now.
I'm not saying these things automatically mean she's attracted to me. She might simply be comfortable enough with me to talk about these things. But I'm already attracted to her, so hearing all of that obviously made my sexual feelings come back even stronger.
Instead na makapag-move forward ako, parang lalo lang akong nahihirapan. Every time we have those kinds of conversations or interactions, it's like she's fueling the fire that I was already trying to put out.
previous attempts:
I tried moving on because I thought she might just be comfy with me, not until she starts talking sexual stuffs and fantasies with me.
Normally, I'd just ignore this kind of thing and focus on my priorities. That's usually how I deal with distractions. Pero lately, it's getting harder because my sex drive is unusually strong, and this situation with my female friend is making them even harder to ignore. I just genuinely don't know how to deal with this level of sex drive right now.
Posted Aug 13, 2026, 4:05 PM UTC