How do you stop looking for external validation when writing the first draft?

Hi everyone,

I’m 16 and currently writing my first fantasy novel. This is a story that’s been living in my head for about two years and I’ve finally got the time to actually sit down and write a decent amount every day.

I’m about 8,000 words in, so I’m still very early on. I’m not really looking for advice on how to deal with the inevitable mess of a first draft. I’m more interested in how you stop yourself from constantly looking for external validation or perspectives while writing it.

After I finish a chapter, I often get a really strong urge to copy and paste it into AI and ask what it thinks.
I actually really hate doing this and I feel guilty every time and I always tell it not to give me advice or suggest changes because I don’t want it influencing the story or how I write (my voice). What I really want from doing this is just some kind of outside perspective.

But I’m starting to wonder whether even getting that perspective is influencing my writing, whether I realise it or not.

Part of the problem is that I really want to tell someone about the book or show them a chapter just to get a bit of guidance.

I don’t really have friends who would be interested in listening to me talk about it or reading it and although my parents would try, they don’t really take the idea of me writing a novel particularly seriously.

I want to be someone who writes stories, rather than someone who just likes the idea of being a writer. Sometimes I worry that wanting validation is getting in the way of actually doing the work and I do admit I LOVE the idea of being a writer and I often quetsion which of the two I am.

Sorry for the ramble, this turned into a bit of a vent. I just don’t know what to do and this is slowing my writing down.

Thank you