Advice on dynamic/kink

Hi all!

I’ve been following this subreddit for quite some time, but using a throwaway now to avoid risk of personal exposure.

I (M39) been married with my wife (F38) for nearly a decade.

I have always had some kinky preferences, but our bedroom life has been quite vanilla - until ~half a year ago, when I suggested a D/s dynamic, which my partner was very positive to.

Since then, our sex life has really developed - we have tried a lot of kinks, and the frequency (which dropped significantly after kids for us) has really picked up. Both are very happy.

I’m the clear dom in our relationship, and she is definitively a sub. Both feel these roles fits us very good. We have taken some BDSM tests to see where our preferences overlap, and this has been a good basis for me in planning our sessions.

We have weekly sessions involving BDSM, where I do all planning in advance, and she puts on make up and prepare to be the princess/slut I prefer.

The question I need some perspectives on (preferably from both doms and subs) is this: my sub do not want to take any active part in planning of sessions. Do not misunderstand me here, she really wants them, but she is very reluctant to give signals on what she want to have in our sessions. She explains that she prefers the dom to be in charge and take initiative, and that she is inexperienced within BDSM. I feel that she has sort of outsourced the planning totally to me. Which is fine for me, because then I’m able to explore all the kinks I would like - which she so far has been more than willing to explore. To give a concrete example on the way she hands over all decisions to me: if I say that she can choose to have my cum in her mouth, pussy or ass today, she answers that she prefers me to choose.

I have encouraged her to share fantasies or requests for upcoming sessions, but she is very reluctant to do so. At the same time, she is pushing for frequent sessions, and state that she loves our dynamic.

Is this behaviour part of someone really going into a submissive mindset? She obviously love the content of the sessions to be unknown to her before the session. I do of course want her to get exactly what she needs, to sustain our dynamic and develop it further.

Please do not only recommend “communication”, I speak with my partner continuously about this - but as the “lead”/dom in the relationship, I want to gather some perspectives from other couples/dynamics, to better understand our dynamic and to communicate more with my partner.

Thanks in advance for all input!