how to recover

im so sick of this phobia, not only im scared of vomiting im also scared of pooping just cause it might cause vomiting lmao, everytime i have to poop i basically panic and wont even poop all that i needed to poop (tmi sorry), in terms of food im finally starting to eat 2-3 meals a day or i try to sometimes its easy and i enjoy it but most time im just constantly checking how my body feel, and somedays like 2 days ago i was anxious the whole day so i couldn't eat well at all, im so exhausted, is it possible to recover without therapy? how can i start recovering when im scares of literally everything 😭