I'm a minor who was accused of sexual assault and I need advice

Okay, so I guess the title explains it well enough, and I really need help.

For my privacy and my former partner's, I am not going to include any personal details. Also, I want to say that I am pretty terrified of my ex-partner finding out about any of this because I've asked for help many times but have had huge backlash from them and their friends because of it, so I thought this would finally be a safe place to talk.

We're both minors; this happened at least two to three years ago. We were teens in a relationship, and I have to admit it was very toxic, not just because of my former partner but also because of me; We were both horrible for each other, and this is a fact. We were young and problematic. I also want to clarify that this is not a hate post or me throwing shade at my former partner; I genuinely need advice because this situation has taken the biggest toll on me and is also the reason that I've tried to take my own life multiple times.

As a victim of sexual assault at a young age myself, I hope people understand how it felt getting accused of the very thing that has been engraved in my mind since it happened to me.

Now for the act that I was accused of, my ex-partner and I used to make out often, but it usually stopped at that in 95% of the situations. Over time, my former partner often wasn't in the mood, and this sometimes panicked me because I thought they were starting to hate me or something like that. It was also affecting my mood, and I used to overthink 24/7 that because of this they didn't love me anymore. Now the reason for this was also the fact that the only "loving" activities, I guess? were these make-out sessions in our relationship because the other times we were just arguing over useless stuff, etc, so when the make-out sessions stopped, and I was getting treated like shit the rest of the time, it really did switch something, and I got super worried.

I started asking my former partner much more frequently to make out, and when I got turned down, I would get even sadder each time. I want to clarify that I did not whatsoever force them to kiss or make out with me ever; I was very much supportive that they weren't in the mood and wouldn't ask again that day. My ex-partner noticed my moods getting worse and me getting more anxious, and they started lashing out at me that I was guilt-tripping them into doing anything with me. Now this made me feel even worse about myself, and I started apologizing and swearing that it wasn't that, but I wouldn't do it again. So I stopped asking, and after that some things just came naturally.

I also want to say that I was a very touch-deprived, depressed 12-year-old at the time, and it can come off as a 7th grader discovering make-out sessions and then couldn't stop living without them. I was naive and stupid.

after a few months, we had a really bad breakup but that was it, but then after the breakup my former partner just drops this huge bomb on me that I assaulted them, and they mentioned what happened few months ago about me "guilt-tripping" them into doing anything with me, they also told me they never wanted to do anything with me after that but when I asked them why they did it then, because they never said a word about not wanting it, they responded with a "I felt bad for you". Now that's where my life ended, honestly. I hated myself; I had no friends or anybody, and my parents didn't even know about the relationship. I tried denying it so much, cried everyday in the summer, nobody knew about this and I just had nobody I only had my ex-partner, and they were the only person I was talking to, they were telling me stuff that I didn't even remember or weren't even sitting in my personality, things that neer happened, how they even slapped me and i didn't go. So I started believing it. I apologized with text and paragraphs, and when my former partner noticed how bad it had affected me, they started changing answers like "don't worry, maybe you didn't do it". I still apologized every day and then figured that I couldn't live with something like this, so I tried taking my life with very limited things that I had, which were pills and antibiotics, I think?

My mental health went into shambles, and that was probably the lowest point of my life.

As a victim myself, I always take the side of the victim no matter what, but in this situation I don't know; this is a person who has destroyed me, not because of this but because of many other stuff too, but a person I cared deeply about. I really need advice on this.