I run my own successful business as a small time contractor (not handy man work just keeping my stuff quiet). Mid twenty’s. Had a lot of jobs but I always come back to working for myself after trying blue collar stuff or restaurant work. I’ve got a college degree. I’m just happier on my feet most days. I like thinking to but more in a project management style. 

I recently got curious about an opportunity through a family friend in a new industry after traveling Europe for many months solo and spent a grand to fly down to a conference an network with people in the new industry. I felt invigorated and happy. But it’s a very old school industry run by boomers. 

While not concrete from what I’ve heard through the grape vine is the company want to pay me wayyy less that what I make as a contractor and think that they’re providing me this massive opportunity by giving me a “stable job”.

But from what I see if I move states my heath insurance may go up minimum. The cost of living is only marginally cheaper.

The benefits are I would learn about the white collar world and maybe get more organized.

I’m getting certificates on project management on my own rn. 

I have mentors and regular clients with my current job. That is much more exciting to me. But I also over work myself to sickness every summer because I live the work and money. And it’s vaguely seasonal. 

I feel safer working 4 jobs and as a contractor because if one company shuts down to decides to cut ties with me I’m always safe. I have what I would consider a really solid retirement for someone my age.

I have had 4 friend’s laid off from “steady solid jobs” because companies are just trying to use less people. My job will always be in person and hands on. 

My mom just wants me to get an interview. But I was called by hr from this Company to set one up and then they ghosted me after I offered call back times and reached out to my family friend a few moments. All in all my gut is very uncomfortable with their communication style and I know this company was recently bought out and the resold by private equity.

I just don’t think paid vacation days and a possible mentorship in organization is worth all this hassle and move states over.

Granted I have had high anxieties about this position and told the family friend privately I don’t know how long I want to live in the state where it’s located. 

I do think leaving my parents behind for a bit and having some separation would be good for me. I rely on them too often and they also use that to provide a lot of pressure. However. I think maybe I can just stand up for myself more.

Also I have been going through several mental health crisis over the last 3 years. I’m only just starting to heal with new doctor and meds for the first time in my life. That’s a lot of change. Rn I live with my best friend since high school and just renovated an old room of his to move into while working 70-80 hours a week. 

I’m exhausted and empowered by what I currently do but I wonder if this new experience would help or hinder my healing and feel deeply insecure about my de Scion to bet on my elder and my current path. 

Which my current career I’ve already restarted once after leaving for another field.

How did you guys ever reconcile betting on yourself and being your own man? 

I want to live in another state before I die. Will choosing to build my own company trap me forever next to my parents? I feel a deep need for a support structure. Should I just keep seeking opportunities and let this one pass? Or secure the interview?

I have been sick so this is my breakfast/dinner with oat milk. 

Tagged this boys only cause I have mostly female influences on my life and feel like this is really connected to me being a man for some reason. 

Going through immense family pressure about a job.