AIO for being offended by my brother’s criticism?

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Me (31, m) and my older brother have gotten pretty close in the years since we both went to college. Beforehand we didn’t get along, in sort of a teenage-nasty, brotherly bickering kind of way. We have always been very different. My brother was surrounded by a close group of friends in high school, while I could, and still can, count my close friends on one hand. I am on the autism/ADHD spectrum, and am prone to high anxiety, while he is neurotypical. We both did well in school, although we pursued different interests—I became interested in music, reading and writing, and art/architecture, while he gravitated towards languages. We are both on the LGBTQ+ spectrum, although he came out in middle school while I still struggle with my sexuality and gender identity.
We both went off to different colleges, studying different fields. I studied architecture and he studied international relations, eventually becoming fluent in Spanish. Around my junior year I entered a period of deep depression that I am still struggling with 10 years later. This coincided with a serious of personal and academic failures that ultimately led to a complete collapse of self-confidence and a series of hospitalizations.
My brother graduated from college, and while he has experienced some setbacks, he bounces back from them and is generally financially stable and content, with many close friends he goes on vacation with and a husband whose shared income allows him to live comfortably. I, meanwhile, have only recently been able to move out of my parents’ house but still require their financial assistance. I have been unable to find work in architecture or any other field that interests me due to my lack of self-confidence, anxiety and depression. Overall the entire act of job hunting leaves me deeply demoralized. I will look at a job listing and feel that I am not qualified, then will either not bother to apply or apply and get rejected. I work a low-paying job in customer service that exhausts me physically and emotionally, and despite my desire to quit and find something better I basically lose the will to try and fall into a spiral of hopelessness.
I call my brother fairly often to talk, maybe once a week or so. Sometimes we just joke and talk about our week, our friends, normal stuff. Often, though, when my mood is low, I share my troubles with him. For the most part he is sympathetic, always willing to listen, and is usually gentle. Occasionally he will get frustrated with me, but even then he acts as a ‘voice of reason’. I generally trust him with my secrets and problems, more so than anyone else, including my parents. My brother also shares his problems with me, and we trust each other to keep these things to ourselves.
With this I am constantly comparing myself to my brother, which has caused an inferiority complex and a complicated feeling of resentment towards him, while also seeking his empathy, approval and validation.
I often share with him the various indignities I face daily at my job. A few weeks ago a customer called me a homophobic slur, which really hurt my feelings. I shared what happened with my brother and then, feeling self-conscious that I was being a downer, tried to post something lighthearted, in this case ‘The new Charlie XCX album is pretty good’. My brother apparently found this so hilarious that he shared a screenshot of our conversation with all of his friends. He apparently does this often with our texts. When he told me a week ago, I laughed it off, as I did see the humor in it, but looking back on it now, I feel hurt that he took a vulnerable moment and treated it as a source of amusement to be shared with strangers.
Fast forward to this week. Thank you for hanging in this long, by the way, I know it’s taken a while to get to this point. Work this week has been particularly grueling and stressful, and on Tuesday night I drank too much and had a video chat with my brother where I lost my temper and raged a little bit. I mentioned that I hadn’t only applied to 5 jobs in the last six months because I didn’t see the point in trying, that I just felt defeated. The next day I called to apologize for my behavior. He accepted my apology, then mentioned my comment about not applying for jobs. He said that he was getting tired of my ‘pity parties’ and that I need to take responsibility for the situation I was in. I felt like I’d been slapped in the face. I have tried so hard in the past to get him to understand my depression, and he completely invalidated me. I was absolutely furious. Thankfully my dad called at that moment so I was able to find an excuse to hang up without tearing into him. After talking to my dad, I wrote my brother a text where I told him how insulted I was and that I did not want him to call me back to apologize, and that my trust in him had been severely damaged.
Come this morning, I still feel angry, but also guilty. It is true that I have rejection-sensitive dysphoria that makes me take rejection harder than others, and I am sensitive to criticism. And I’m starting to worry that I’m using my brother and other friends as therapists, overwhelming them with my troubles. And I will admit his words did motivate me to apply for several jobs out of spite. But he words deeply hurt me, and together with his admission that he shares embarrassing things about me with his friends make me feel that I no longer can trust him. Am I overreacting? If so, how much?