I Keep Getting Called Back To Christianity

Hello everyone, I am Camiren. A 24 year old male. As a young boy..I was always a loving, compassionate, and empathetic person. I love to help others, and do services for others except for myself. As a teen, I doubted God/Jesus. I thought I was a “satanist” but I couldn’t do it. I’m not a person who can kill somebody or a pet for pleasure and feel no emotions towards them.

I’ve dealt with major depression, anxiety, betrayal trauma, bulling, and not being able to accept my Mild Intellectual Disability as “this is me”. I’ve always been a curious individual.

Every time I stray away from the Lord…he keeps reminding me and putting me back on track even if I don’t think about it. I as well wanted the Lord to show himself or just something visual or verbal, then that leads to me thinking about death and it spirals from there.

If I could give someone, anyone hope…I want to say don’t give up. Life is short, it goes by fast. Yes, some people are rude and ignorant but like god said “turn the other cheek”. You don’t have to live for yourself but you can live for those who care about you, and the Lord. God Bless Everyone