Can't wait to be done with socializing online in general, ugh...

Now that I fully understand what's going on with my situation of my internet, it cannot come any sooner that I'd be done with just everything in regards to online socializing. It's just tiring and it's a bunch of noise. Lots of noise, including your own. It sucks when you're an opinionated individual, because you almost feel like you have to have your input in somewhere, anywhere.

And when you're engaging in this constant level of noise, you lose sense of yourself and wind up just conflicting yourself. Like not knowing if anything you're saying is really what you believe or have faith in saying it from what you're saying if it meant getting a reaction of any kind.

It is more problematic when you run into roadblocks that just ruins the momentum of socializing online. These road blocks are in the forms of people who're power-tripping from what little power they're given to moderate. In the forms of people who heavily prioritize in flame-baiting, thought policing, redirecting your thoughts and just getting outright argumentative for the sake of being argumentative.

That is all just more noise with the addition of frustration. I don't really have a lasting on any account in any social media platform, even when I've had the honest intention in mind, to contribute without looking for any trouble.

I last an average of maybe 1 ~ 3 months, lucky at the third month. I expect myself to be banned or restricted for prolonged periods, over something I've said, over someone getting report-happy, over this and over that. It's just exhausting as all fuck to continually start over and over again.

Which is why I will be in glee to have it all over with. I don't know, maybe I don't want to stay offline for 2 months, maybe I'll just go the rest of the year. It's gotten to where, whenever I think about going online again, I am mentally disgusted, whereas before deciding this, I was conflicted. Like worrying about keeping tabs on things. Now I just don't give as much of a fuck, there are other things that need my time and space.