the change is false and they will hurt you again

when I realized my abusive ex was abusive, I told him. I broke down the strategies I knew he was using, I pointed out specific incidents, I told him everything. he was shocked. he was hurt. like he didn't know. he promised a lot. he promised therapy, changed behavior, learning and growth.

I got it. and fast, too. he was doting, made sure I had everything I needed at all times. he took me places, bought me things, helped me with anything I needed. it felt perfect. I was so happy. I felt like I was in heaven.

he assaulted me. in bed together, lights still on. I broke free from his hold and cried in the other room. eventually he came in and asked me to just go to bed with him, exasperated.

there wasn't any warning signs that he was going to do this. everything was really perfect for a while. and then he did something awful.

I left a few days later.

it will keep happening. your abuser will do whatever they have to to keep you, even if it means faking change.