Advice needed re: aging mom

I am a 49 yr old F with 2 kids ages 10 and 12 yrs old. Years ago we moved back to my mom’s city (where I was raised) to have our kids and raise them near her. My dad died, my husband’s family is in Atlanta, so she was our only real family. They have a beautiful relationship with her, although as they’re getting older and more independent they see her less. She is 83 years old, still living alone in her home, and driving. She’s had some health scares, but overall generally healthy for her age. My brother is barely involved and calls her once in a while from overseas.

My dilemma is that I hate my job and I hate where we live. The climate and the city we’re in stinks, and the public schools are bad. I am getting job offers in desirable places that I would love to move the family to. Places that have good public schools. We could make it work where we are, but it would feel like I’m at a crossroads with where I want to raise my kids for the next 7 years (which also involves university opportunities and outdoors for them).

But I am really really worried about my mom. She says she wouldn’t move if we did, and I don’t blame her. She is terrified of being put into a nursing home. I can also tell that since retirement she is lonely and wants to see us regularly. Most of my friends whose parents live far away move them closer to them, but this isn’t an option for us. When I discuss how she would do if we left, she just laughs and says “I’m fine, I’ll visit you” and I think it’s her way of giving her blessings. But I also know deep down she would miss us deeply.

How do you decide between your own life/job/kids and your aging mother who is alone and undoubtedly will need you more and more? Does anyone regret moving away from your mother? Does anyone NOT regret moving away? Any perspectives valued and appreciated.