Could bupropion stop working after months?

​

I've been taking bupropion for quite a while now. Around a year., and I'm starting to wonder whether it has stopped working for me.

Until recently, I felt like it was helping me quite noticeably. I have AuDHD and normally have a very busy mind, with lots of overlapping thoughts. Lately, however, my mind has become unusually quiet. Not in a peaceful or focused way, but more like there is simply... nothing there.

I'm also experiencing what feels like emotional blunting. If someone asks me how I'm feeling, I genuinely don't know how to answer because I can't seem to identify what I'm feeling anymore.

At the same time:

- I'm sleeping very little.

- I'm becoming mentally overwhelmed by stimulation at work.

- I'm struggling to get anything done both at work and at home, even though I know exactly what I'm supposed to do.

- My functioning at work has noticeably declined.

- I feel emotionally disconnected rather than simply sad or anxious.

What's especially confusing is that I've had quite a lot of therapy and I know the techniques I'm supposed to use to deal with thoughts and emotions. The problem is that I currently feel like I have nothing to work with. There aren't really clear thoughts or emotions there to process.

I've also suspect that I've been experiencing signs of burnout for roughly two years now.

This started around the time I began therapy. At one point, I was put on medication that turned out to be the wrong medication for me, and during that period I even experienced an out-of-body experience. Despite all of this, I continued working and basically kept pushing through, including during periods when my sleep was severely affected.

Back then, my sleep problems looked very different. My mind was racing constantly, and I couldn't fall asleep because of the sheer amount of thoughts going through my head.

Now it's almost the opposite. My mind is unusually quiet, but I'm waking up around four times a night. So although I don't have the same racing thoughts keeping me awake, my sleep is still very disrupted.

There has also been a major relationship event about two months ago that I'm wondering could be contributing to all of this.

My partner technically "cheated" on me, although I'm still struggling with whether that's the right word for what happened. The situation was much more complicated and traumatic than a straightforward case of cheating.

This caused us to both get the LGV bacteria for a couple months and had anyibiotics for 3 weeks, but is now finished.

My partner has a history of being afraid to show weakness or vulnerability. During a verbal fight, he became angry and left because he felt unwelcome. He decided to pack up all of his belongings and leave. While he was still angry and looking for a distraction, he went to a party, took drugs, and eventually passed out. While incapacitated, he was sexually assaulted/raped on the streets during Gay Pride in Utrecht.

He is now in therapy and is finally starting to process what happened and show his emotions more openly. Interestingly, our relationship currently feels almost like we're dating again. I'm seeing emotions and vulnerability from him that I hadn't really seen before, which is actually a very positive change for our relationship.

At the same time, I think the entire situation may have affected me more deeply than I initially realized. I don't really feel angry, sad, or even particularly upset in a way that I can identify. I mostly feel... nothing. And that makes it very difficult to understand what is happening inside my own head.

Added to this whole story, my cat (last pet from childhood) passed away. From that moment, some kind of a switch went off for me.

So I'm wondering whether this could be related to bupropion, the prolonged stress/burnout I've been experiencing, the recent relationship trauma, the lack of sleep, or some combination of these things.

Has anyone experienced something similar while taking bupropion? Can bupropion feel like it has suddenly become less effective, or can this kind of emotional/cognitive shutdown happen for other reasons while still taking it?

I'm not planning to change my dose or stop taking it myself, but I'm trying to understand whether this could be related to bupropion or whether I should be looking at other causes.

I'd really appreciate hearing from people who have experienced something similar and I'm sorry for taking away your free time for this enormous amount of text.

I'm worried.