Virgin getting into bdsm

I'm 18f but I know I cannot be in a non bdsm relationship and I'm a virgin I don't know how to safely find someone to date .I'm not comfy with hookups of course but even if I was dating a person it would take months to sleep with them.im also a very heavy set woman if that matters 5'3 290.I guess I'm asking for advice to find good people in this community without jumping head first.