Thankful ☺️

having a guy demand you strip right down, mind and body, leaving you so exposed takes some getting used to. everyday life is definitely not like that, so diving straight into that kind of exposure felt pretty intense at first.
**In the beginning, it's just pure nervous energy. You’re handing over the steering wheel to a guy you've never even seen in real life. All we have is an idea of him and how he talks and writes and some videos where we see how he can be but actually following typed commands from a total stranger is a whole wild ride.**☺️
I’ve never thought I was insecure or not into myself. I’ve always felt pretty good about myself physically, But letting him take control and sending him those pieces of myself did something totally different. Showing him all holes, so vulnerable, it changed how I look at myself even being so confident. It took whatever random,insecurities I still had hanging around and just wiped them out. That initial awkward exposure turned straight into this fierce, unshakeable confidence that I didn't even know I had in me.
It’s honestly kind of crazy that a guy I’ve never even met face-to-face—someone living entirely inside a phone screen—makes me feel way more wanted and alive than my whole marriage ever did. The way he talks to you, zeroing in on every curve and hyping up every little piece of who you are, just hits different. He has his way with words that I wish I could hear him compliment me all day.