Feeling anger regarding mental health professionals

I'm 30 and in the process of getting an official diagnosis from a psychiatrist. I've been seeing mental health professionals since being 18. I've been diagnosed with different things but mostly nobody has talked about neurodiversity to me. It was always just depression, or anxiety or a personality disorder or just being very shy, and polite as a kid.

When I've asked my psychologist if she thinks I have autism, she told me that I wouldn't have achieved the things I have, if I did. The only big societal accomplishment is that I got into law school but I still haven't gotten my degree at 30.

My 20s were challenging and I feel resentment towards these specialists who dismissed me, just because I appear normal. I struggle with everything, food, noise, all other kinds of stimuli. I need rest and alone time, I struggle at work, can't properly articulate myself.

I just feel angry cause I feel in the base of everything, it's that I see the world through a neurodiverse brain and I should've received appropriate help but I didn't. I was dismissed again and again by professionals and family, school. Nobody saw that I was struggling under the mask of a high achieving shy student.

I still don't feel comfortable discussing with people, my neurodiversity, because I'm afraid they'll think, I'm lying or using it as a cop out.

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