Women who mastered their ADHD, how tf did you do it!?!?!?

I am drowning in my terrible habits. Everything seemed to be fine all the way through school, which I now realize was because hard deadlines were the only way I’d get anything done. I once even did an entire PowerPoint assignment 2 hours before I was to present it for a class (passed though). But after graduating college, life is nothing like school. I forget everything until someone yells at me for it then forget again. I get distracted as easily as a goldfish, having tons of things to do overwhelms me to the point that I do nothing. I get lost on simple conversations and have to ask a long of clarifying questions which pisses people off. I planned a trip with my bf a year ago and am just now buying things less than 30 days out. If something doesn’t immediately stimulate me or entertain me, I get bored and my mind wonders even when talking to others. I am not artistic at all. Everything has to have a specific set of instructions to follow (like color by number books or Diamond painting) or I get overwhelmed and irritated and feel like crying and giving up.

All of this has seriously affected my life and personal relationships. I haven’t been formally diagnosed but I’m fairly certain it’s ADHD because I’ve ruled out neurological issues and I don’t know what to do about it. I’ve tried reminders, planners, daily to do lists, reminder apps, gamified reminders, adhd apps and nothing works. I haven’t tried meds yet but idk if those would be right for me and I wouldn’t even know who to go to for that. Please help!!!!!