HELP: I hate my dress. 2 Brides. October Wedding.

We decided to do the first look photos/tradition, and so we decided not to shop together (both of these things were BAD ideas and I already have regrets). I knew she was going to wear a black dress, and I wanted white (this also, in retrospect, is probably not a great idea, but it sounded like a good idea at the time).

I need a new dress that ACTUALLY will work WITH my partner's dress and I need urgent advice from someone who is nice but isn't going to bullshit me.

My partner left a tab open and I happened to see it on her computer when she walked away one day and she's not on reddit, so...here's her Azazie dress - black with champagne. She's a size 6 (in wedding dress), which is basically the same as most of the models on wedding sites - thin, narrow shoulders and hips. Yes I feel guilty about peeking, no I can't un-peek, and yes it's relevant to the post so...there you go.

Imgur link to my pictures here. Pic 1 is real life me (please please be kind). Pic 2 is real life me standing next to the black/champagne dress that the shop had on hand, which seemed close enough to my partner's dress. Pic 3 and 4 is real life me again (behind).

I'm....a LOT more curvy (and apparently getting WAY more self-conscious about that as wedding day gets closer). A lot of things just flat out don't look great on me, despite absolutely trying to destroy my body with workouts. She loves my body and I believe her but...I've spent 8 months getting basically nowhere and I've never been so self-conscious in my life as I am now. I'm also hitting perimenopause and...honestly? My fiancee is HOT.

That said, I just had to pick something by end of July and I kind of felt pressured by a friend to get something bought before it was too late. It was my third store. I have a bad habit of being criminally, horribly indecisive. I trusted my friend - who is an interior designer with great outfit taste on herself - that this was "the one" and...it looked fine on me, I guess? I haven't had a moment of YES I LOVE THIS like every single bride seems to. No crying, no cheesy smile...nothing just...feels right. But I don't wear wedding dresses regularly?!?! I live in leggings and baggy t-shirts and running shoes. I had to order SOMETHING or I would have nothing by wedding day.

Wedding date is end of October.

I spent so much money on this dress...and I hate it now that I've worn it a second time at the fitting. I genuinely hate it and I don't want to go to my own wedding and I feel like we're going to look ridiculous next to each other (are we even going to the same event?). I feel like our beautiful first look moment is just going to be me pretending to be really happy while internally dying and feeling like I don't want to be at my own wedding. In fact, if I could take it all back and elope right now so that no one would look at me, that seems better, actually (obviously I can't do that - invites are sent and vendors are booked). We're going to look so silly and mismatched and unfortunate together. My partner absolutely LOVES her dress and is 1000000% excited (but everything always looks amazing on her...).

I would ask a friend for advice, but I'm sure all of my nice, polite, very kind friends would just say "OH YOU LOOK GREAT!!! DONT WORRY!!! WILL WORK OUT!!!" and...I need real advice.