I feel a little lost where I am. Where do I even go from here?

I’m 23f, I live in Ontario (I do think I would like to move to a different province in the future if this affects anything).

I graduated university with a bachelors in International Relations with a minor in Women and Gender Studies over a year ago. Luckily before the IR program was ransacked and turned into a joke. I really enjoyed my classes, and I do think I have a very unique perspective on things given the educational background I have. I currently work in a personal injury law firm as a legal assistant for accident benefits, going on my third year in February. It’s a good job and offers me good experience. I am quite lucky and am very grateful. I only make $22.55 an hour, but I am hoping there is a possibility I get a raise by end of year considering how much ladder climbing I have done in a short span of time. I have learned so much for my age.

Growing up I had several dreams for several careers, as most do, but that trend never really stopped. In highschool, I was not focused on anything, I had multiple ideas of what I wanted to do with no clear path. I won’t get into details, but I wasn’t well mentally or physically at all times. I ended up being persuaded by my parents to apply for IR and then further persuaded to accept the offer. My first 2 years weren’t great, partly due to ADHD and Fibromyalgia being undiagnosed and no accommodations, and partly because I was off campus living and had a hard time creating community. I felt very isolated in my program, and it kind of hurt me in the end (I feel like it did at least). I don’t have a lot to show for my university career except for being a TA and taking classes for prevention of violence.

My last two years were awesome, I got accommodations so my grades went up because I was finally able to function properly (was also coping better with a lot of executive dysfunction in my own time). I also started becoming more included in my classes when seminars hit, I LOVED seminars. I talked and talked, and my professors adored it. My one seminar I finished in the 90s. I really enjoyed conversing on topics, and bringing in my unique perspective from my other studies.

Anyways, all of that is to show you all what I’ve enjoyed throughout my program, and partly why I feel stuck.

I don’t know where to go from here. I really wanted to complete a masters, but I haven’t gotten there yet. And I kind of feel pressure from my parents about it, especially my dad. I don’t want to throw myself into whatever again, like I did for my undergrad. I also would ideally like it to lead somewhere, obviously. My research on IR lied to me, lol.

For a long while, I wanted to do social work. I just cannot justify with myself working for free for a couple months- I don’t think I can afford that, and I don’t know how others can. I guess social work is a privileged program, which is ironic. It also may drain me badly and I am not entirely sure I’m equipped for that- a personal relationship I have now is showing me that. While I’m empathetic and compassionate, I absorb other people’s feelings and situations way too much.

My other idea was urban development/city planning. I really enjoyed that topic throughout my classes, and enjoyed seeing how much community you can build when your cities are walkable, for example. Unfortunately, I am not even sure where to begin with this, and if I am even able to with what I have under my belt. I also want to be able to keep working, because I can’t afford not to, so I need to be able to do a masters that allows for this.

But what if I didn’t go back for my masters for a while? I planned to stay in my job now that it’s stable and secure (was bouncing between positions for a while at the office). I want to have a minimum of 4 years on my resume, but 5 would be ideal. The only thing is, the pay is not amazing for my situation, and I sometimes feel overly stressed with the work load.

I also thought about trying to get a job with the city to see if I could get my foot in the door anywhere, maybe see what exactly I like. Ultimately, I wan to help my community, I want to help people, I want to bring some kind of change even if it’s minimal. That’s always been something I’ve dreamt of. Seeing my community thriving makes me joyful.

I have so many ideas for projects too, like starting up a pen pal program for the homeless community, opening a book store that doubles as a space for community projects like fundraisers, speakers, story telling, writer functions, and activities for the youth and struggling. Etc..

I guess to sum it all up, I feel like there’s 15 paths and I have to choose one. It’s giving me whiplash. I know I’m young and have time to fully settle into something, but I guess I want to start planning and finding my groove, where I fit into the world.

I don’t have a lot of people in my life I feel comfortable getting guidance from. Does anyone have any advice? All advice is welcome, you don’t have to speak to everything I mentioned either. I would love to hear from anyone who has the heart to share their thoughts with me, I truly appreciate it. I can answer any questions.