Does anyone else find dating apps difficult as a demisexual?

Discussion

I’m a straight guy who’s been single for 7 years now. The main reason I’m single is because I just don’t have any active crushes. I have a lot of female friends and acquaintances, but none that I want a relationship with.

My (allosexual) sister keeps encouraging me to give the apps a try. But the problem is, a dating app profile tells you nothing about who that person actually is. I might find a profile for a woman who I find attractive and who shares some interests with me, but I still don’t know her. Just finding her hot isn’t enough to make me want to pursue a relationship. Any time I’ve desired a relationship with someone, it’s because I’ve gotten to know them and really connected with their personality. And I know, that can be found out on a date, but I don’t have a strong desire to spend time and money on a complete stranger that I know next to nothing about.

I wonder if sexual desire is the driving factor that makes dating apps work for the majority of people; if you go on a date, and that person really isn’t a match for you, hey, you might at least get laid before calling it off! But of course, that’s not me. I’m perfectly willing to stay single for 7 more years if that’s how long it takes to meet my person.

Can anyone relate? Or is this unique to me?

Posted Aug 21, 2026, 2:26 AM UTC

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