I’m having really bad anxiety before surgery :( less then 2 weeks until my de tethering

Hello all. I am 23 and have been dealing with many symptoms from tethered cord including progressive leg weakness, leg spacisity, severe nerve pain, neurogenic bladder, hyperreflexia reflexes, and currently am mostly home a lot of the time other then for doctors appointments due to pain and mobility struggles. My surgery is September 2nd.

I am having surgery September 2nd. I am very hopeful to stop the progression but also feel so scared. I am in therapy but I honestly think this is just something that will feel scary until I’m through it. I am having surgery out of state which also adds a huge level of anxiety for me as I am autistic and just don’t do great with major changes. I will be away from my home, from my cats I love so much, my partner, and my friends I love for atleast 2 weeks and that’s if there are no complications.

I also have had some traumatic medical experiences most memorable being a spinal hematoma and csf leak at the same time when I was 15. That was the worst pain I’ve been in my entire life and that’s coming from someone who lives in pain every day. I was in the hospital an awhile and needed help with pretty much everything for a bit. My brain keeps worrying this will be the same thing but I know this surgery is to help overall stop the progression which is making me loose my ability to walk. This surgery has a real reason and isn’t a painful injury I have to fight through without a reason.

Im honestly just posting this to vent a bit and maybe here from others who have been through this surgery. It’s hard dealing with health issues while at college level age (or any age but being young others can sometimes not understand especially people not close to you since they don’t see your everyday life and daily struggles) I know this surgery will be for the better. And if I was able to recover from the hematoma I will also be able to recover from this. But right now it feels so so daunting and scary! Thanks so much for reading apologizes for this being rambly and a bit of a downer.